


What will I do without you?

by Potato_Master



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Gen, POV Alternating, Post-Squip, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Notes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-18 17:46:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16521755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potato_Master/pseuds/Potato_Master
Summary: You were always there by my side? What happened? Why did it change? I'm sorry for the harm I caused, I wonder if it was all my fault. If I could change it, I would. But I can't I just have to stand by and remember.





	What will I do without you?

A few months ago, life was hell. But at least I had you with me. Rich may have been an ass to both of us, but we were together. What changed? I know what. You just couldn't let go of the idea of being popular. You idolozed it. You idolized her. I shouldn't have been so pushy. I should have told you to let go of her. But I didn't now I'm alone because of it.  
A few months ago, Rich hated you, now you are best buds and your friend that stood by your side by thirteen years was forgotten. 13!! Thirteen years that you threw down drain, I had a hoped that it would go back to normal. But it seems I'm less than second plain to you. Our traditions, our inside jokes, our memories, what are they to you now? Cause you don't seem to care.  
Maybe I just have to wait and be patient but everyday you seem more and more apart from me, my friend, my brother, my only companion in this world. You are the only one that knows what I been through. Not my moms, not any other of my classmates.  
I never truly felt the loneliness that surronded us until you left me alone to it. You were like a goddamn moth to the light, following popularity. I'm glad you're better, but if you forgot me so easily when I only think of you, of us, then is it worth seeing you happy? Even as I am tumbling through the scholar year as you march wirh your new friends, your new girlfriend, your new stationary table. You sicken me, not really. But i feel left out. Do I join? How do I join? And not only that if I join, will I be accepted? Everyday the desire of not being here feels me more. I'm there physically but noone notices me. Not even you, too busy with your brand new life, aren't you. Too busy to even see I have never left your side. If you left me after you passed your time of misery, was I friend, or your pedestal? Maybe I will never know. I wonder how you'll react when you find the letter, when you find me. This is my last day, so I start writing. I look for a paper sheet, I find a white A4 paper, there's a drawing on the back, I was planing to finishing it and giving it to you in your birthday, but as many other things, it's unfinished, I'll leave it like that. I look for a pen, I find a black pen with a logo of a cheap amusement park, we went together with my moms this summer, you have one of the same. I start writing.


End file.
